I am really missing my mom right now. When the weather starts to get cold and crisp I think about her often. I don't know why. She just has a connection to winter in my heart. This is homecoming week. I wish she was here to watch me and Jace get everything ready and help us(me) organize everything. She would be loving the craziness of it all. Every big event in my life such as homecoming and award banquets and things like that a small piece of me is missing. It gets me every time. I think of what is to come like prom, graduation, and my wedding. She won't be there. That is the hardest thing for my heart to accept. It hasn't yet and I don't think it ever will. I just miss her presence she brought light to our house and a comfort that many people cant contain. She truly was the greatest woman I knew. And I know a lot of people can agree with me.
This Africa trip is kind of me fulfilling what my mom could never do. I am doing it for God first. He is the reason I am going over there. But my mom always wanted to go and serve in another country. But she couldn't. She was to sick. Her heart was for people. I want to carry on her legacy in the midst of creating my own.
Christ is so strong. He is holding my heart together as it is aching. He is helping me get through the days. He is giving me joy. I can be joyful in these times because of HIM. I love Him.